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When Substance Use and Abuse Affects Your Family

In addition to the tragedy of death and illness due to the COVID-19 outbreak, many families across the nation are facing a distinctly different threat: Substance abuse. The numbers are staggering—an increased rate of overdose and deaths due to the concurrent opioid crisis, as well as increased rates of abuse of alcohol and other substances, makes home less safer than most families would want. If you suspect that substance abuse is affecting your family, make it a mission to seek effective substance abuse counseling for yourself, or encourage other family members to do the same. While you cannot force someone else to change their behavior, you can recognize how it may affect your family. Read on to find out family-focused tips from a Littleton behavior psychologist on how these signs show up and how you can manage them.

When Parents Use: Effects on Kids

Recreational substance use, when done responsibly and away from children, is not a problem for most adults. However, when use turns to abuse, or when it becomes an everyday event, children can be exposed to risks. Many Littleton child behavior psychologists help children work through the challenges of an addicted parent, including the fear of the parent dying or being harmed, challenges with responsible parents, and increased emotion. Many households with substance abuse are more likely to see domestic violence or child abuse, because people on substances typically don’t make good parenting decisions. For parents who are fully immersed in addiction, even basic parenting tasks like having food on the table, making sure everyone is clean, and paying bills may go ignored. One parent may shoulder all the stress, putting a wedge in your relationship , or both parents may use together.

Substances Come Between Couples

Whether one or both partners is using or abusing substances, the couple relationship will be challenged. If you are an addict, you may “love” your substance more than your partner—or, at least, that’s how it may feel. Resentment, anger, and conflict can follow. When both partners are abusing substances together, the situation may feel right, but this can quickly devolve into codependency. If you notice that “couple time” is being taken over by “drug or alcohol time,” consider this a red flag! Consulting with a Littleton couples therapist is a great way to determine if there is something amiss in your relationship, or something amiss in the substance use.

When You Suspect Your Child Is Using

Grown ups aren’t the only ones using substances. Many children and teens are experimenting more with substances, ranging from illegal substances purchased from peers, to sneaking medications from the medicine cabinet. Teen substance use can devastate your family . First and foremost, always lock up medicines! Your teenager likely knows more about opiate and prescription pill abuse than you do, so keep those controlled substances under your control. While your child may be showing normal symptoms of “teenager,” such as sleeping a lot, communicating less, or being irritable, these can also be similar to signs of substance use. If behaviors seem unlike the normal teenage malaise, don’t hesitate to start a conversation or explore further.

When you or someone you love has problems with substance use, getting help can seem like climbing a mountain. Offer to make that climb with your partner or child, or reach out for help if you feel your own substance use has gotten out of control. In addition to evidence-based substance abuse treatment, couples therapy and family therapy can help strengthen the family system to support sobriety.

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How To Strengthen Social Skills From Home

Formal education systems have many benefits that go beyond academic instruction. Just like the workplace for adults, school provides children with a place to go, a purpose, and many opportunities to practice socialization, conflict negotiation, and self-regulation. With most children out of school since Spring Break, and questions being raised of whether they will truly return to brick-and-mortar education in the fall, many parents are calling their expert child behavior psychologist in Littleton with a big question: how can I make sure my child doesn’t fall behind socially? Read on to find out some key social strength  areas you can help your child build from home!

Initiating Play and Friendships

This is one of the hardest tasks for people of all ages. Whether your kindergartener was hesitant to ask another child for a push on the swings, or your high schooler is rejoicing at the fact that they don’t have to find a place to sit at lunch anymore, attending to the very first stage of friendship is so important. With digital technology, these same challenges can present themselves. How do you help your child reach out to friends and make plans? Keep in mind that younger children do not have the same sense of time and urgency that adults do—they may whine all day to see their best friend, but forget a play date the next day. As an adult, help to model good skills like scheduling appointments, setting reminders, and being accountable for social time.

Self-Regulation Promotes Good Socialization

Even the friendliest of children can struggle if they cannot regulate their own bodies, words, or feelings. Even when your child is home alone away from other children, she can build these skills. When you bring your child for play therapy in Highlands Ranch, your play therapist may suggest helping your child to learn and label her feelings, express disagreements in a productive manner, and practice tools to calm down and relax. Practicing these skills at home can be a great opportunity to develop these skills for the future.

Agree to Play!

Unlike play with other children, much play between adults and children is educational or serving a purpose. While instructive play is a great way to practice skills, free play is a vital part of helping your child  build his imagination, creativity, and problem-solving skills! If you can carve just five minutes out of your day, invite your child to lead a free-play session. The only rules are that everyone stays safe and respectful, and you have to follow your child’s lead! This isn’t the time to prompt for colors, math, or spelling—but a great time to challenge your child with ethical dilemmas or outright silliness! Worried about being a “good enough” playmate for your younger child? Don’t be intimidated—let them tell you what to do and feel free to make mistakes. Set a timer so you and your child both know when special play time is over for the day.

Today’s children are facing so many challenges as they try to live their lives behind closed doors. As we keep their futures in mind as parents, educators, and healthcare providers, it is our job to help them build a strong foundation to launch from once things calm down. While most kids have some struggles, if you feel that your child has been severely traumatized, regressed in social skills, or is showing emotional concerns, don’t hesitate to speak with a skilled child psychologist in Colorado. Most providers are doing telehealth child psychology by video, with socially distant in-person services for those in need. Dr. Lazarus and Zeke would love to visit with you soon, so call now to find out how to make a positive change.